Couple Faces Surrogacy Dilemma Over Egg Donation and Fairness

After eight years together, a couple is nearing the financial ability to pursue surrogacy because the woman cannot conceive naturally due to vaginismus and severe endometriosis, and she also worries about health complications from pregnancy. Her fiancé prefers using his sperm and her eggs, arguing it would be cheaper and quicker, but she is terrified of the hormone injections, monitoring, and egg retrieval surgery, especially given her mild scoliosis and diagnosed major depressive disorder.

The column advises her to clearly voice her concerns, explore other donor options such as a relative, and ensure the conversation respects both partners' feelings. It emphasizes that families are formed through various arrangements and that fairness does not have to dictate every choice. Open, compassionate dialogue and mutual compromise are presented as essential for moving forward toward parenthood.